Chapter Four - Growing A Synagogue Part One - Welcoming - A Welcoming Building

A Welcoming Building – A Self Test

Try this experiment. Go to the front of your building, the part of the building that can be seen from the road, the place where your driveway connects with the street, and look at your facility as if you are seeing it for the first time. Take a moment and put yourself in the shoes of a first time visitor. While you are standing there, ask yourself these questions:

1. Can you see the signs/building when driving on the street or only after you enter the driveway? Just because “everyone” knows that you are supposed to enter the parking lot from the “back”, do visitors have to drive past the building and turn around because they can only see the turn when it is too late?
2. Once you are in the driveway, is it clear where a visitor is supposed to park? Do they have any way of knowing where the closer parking is or will they always park in the wrong lot? Remember, the door used during the week may be different from the door used on Shabbat. The door used by the school may be different from the one that leads to the offices. Is it clear where all these entrances are in relation to the parking lot?
3. Can a visitor find the main entrance easily? If there are many doors, are there signs telling someone while they are still in the car, where they need to park and where they will enter? I belonged to a congregation where years ago they stopped using the “old” entrance to the building and started using a different entrance on a different side of the building. As I would walk up to the building every Shabbat, I always found someone at the “old” entrance trying to get in the locked doors. There was no sign that the entrance had been moved to the other side of the building. Often we found that visitors who decided to walk around the building looking for the entrance, would circle the building to the right and walk around the entire campus before finding the proper doors that would have been found easier if they had gone to the left. There is nothing more frustrating than not being able to find your way inside the building and finding every door locked. I once visited a church and there were signs everywhere; the problem was that I didn't know the lingo. Was I looking for the “vestry”? What was the “nave” or the “chancel” ? The signs were of no help; these signs needed to be written in a way that that any visitor, especially one who does not know church lingo, can understand.
4. After visitors find the proper entrance, can they find their way around inside? Are there signs that point to the main office, the Rabbi's office, the Cantor's office, the Education office? Is there a sign pointing out the sanctuary, or the chapel where daily services are held. (Does the chapel have its own outside entrance? How would a visitor to daily minyan, who arrives when the offices are still closed, find their way to minyan?) Can a visitor find the Gift Shop and the Rest Rooms? Remember if these rooms are “named” would a visitor be able to find them if they don't know the “name”? (Does the sign say: “Levine Hall” or does it say, “Levine Social Hall”? To a visitor the second name gives more information than the first name.)
5. Do the people who work in your office have name tags that identify them by name? Besides the security issue, how will someone who is lost know who to ask for help and directions? Often the only person who has a name on his or her shirt is the janitor.
6. Finally, who will be the first person a visitor will meet when entering the building? Who is the receptionist? Who is the greeter/usher? Does that person have a welcoming personality or are they too busy to notice someone in the lobby? I was once visiting a hospital that I had never been in before. I don't think that I walked more than ten steps in any direction without someone on the staff offering to help me find what I was looking for. Does that happen in your congregation on a weekday? On Shabbat?

In addition to the physical entrances to your building, there are also other “entrances”. What is the experience of someone calling on the phone? Do they get a live human being or do they go directly to voice mail? How many numbers do they have to push to hear a live human voice? What about the website; is it warm and friendly? Synagogues have a tendency to put pictures of their building on their home page. A synagogue is NOT a building, it is a community. Leave the building to a different page; the home page should have lots of smiling people doing fun activities.

When a person does become a member, what then? Do they get a call or letter from the Rabbi? The President? From someone asking them to join a committee or a project? If you don't invite someone to participate, then don't be surprised if they are not so quick to volunteer. Is the only thing they get for their membership a bill?

Fifty years ago, a family would first join a synagogue and then look around to decide in which of the activities to participate. Today, it is exactly the opposite. With so many options in life, so many distractions and so many ways to spend our time, a Jew first has to see what he or she might want to do at a synagogue and then  decide if they want to join. This is why having many “entrances” to synagogue life is so important. What does your synagogue offer those who are looking for a place to express their Judaism? Do you have opportunities for involvement for Singles? For divorced parents? For men and women who work and commute long days? What does your synagogue do to “engage” newcomers in synagogue activities? Do you really want the first contact with someone new to be about “finances” or membership?

The goal is to create, from the time a person arrives in the synagogue parking lot, until they leave the kiddush/oneg Shabbat/collation after the service, the feeling that the stranger is welcome here. It should be easy to maneuver around the building. There should be plenty of people who are there to offer assistance and information. People sitting near the visitor should take a moment, when appropriate, to introduce themselves and perhaps make some introductions to others who may be sitting nearby. Visitors should be invited to have some small honor in the service and after the service, they should be able to meet other members, who will show them around, introduce them to the clergy and show them where there is information about other synagogue events. Making someone feel welcome is all about how you reach out and make them feel as if they are among friends.

The hard part of welcoming people in our congregation, is that there may be many strangers who attend on Shabbat who are guests of somebody who is celebrating a life cycle event at the synagogue and who may have little or no interest in becoming a member. There could be dozens of guests for an anniversary or a special birthday. There could be hundreds of guests invited to a Bar or Bat Mitzvah. How do you know if the stranger who arrives is a potential member or just the guest of the family who is celebrating? The answer is: It doesn't matter. When we cultivate a culture of welcoming, even to those who are there for reasons other than potential membership, they will remember how welcome they were made to feel and will carry that with them for a long time. If someone should ask them what to do when visiting your city, they will recommend the place where they were made to feel so welcome.

While the clergy and the ushers should be trained in how to make people feel welcome, it is important to foster a culture of welcoming in every member. When your members see a stranger, they should be able to step up and help that person feel welcome, and make sure that they did not slip past the usher and miss out on the information they were supposed to receive when they arrived. No system is perfect, but the goal is to make welcoming strangers the responsibility of every member every day.